Retro Review // WWE Judgment Day 2004

May 2004 – The Frankie/Eamon debacle was dominating the music charts, Friends aired its last ever episode and WWE's SmackDown brand was promoting Judgment Day. The show was promoted around three singles matches, with a lot of big name talent...and Rene Dupree. Dupree was set to challenge John Cena for his newly won United States Championship, whilst Booker T went head to head with The Undertaker and the newly rechristened John “Bradshaw” Layfield found himself with an opportunity for Eddie Guerrero's WWE title. Whilst the undercard didn't appear to offer all that much, there was potential for a good PPV if the top matches could deliver...but did they? Lets take a look. 

So, yeah, the show begins with the traditional video package...but this one takes on a much darker tone in retrospect and actually becomes a little hard to watch as it focuses on the theme of Judgement (because it's Judgment Day obvs). You're probably wondering what makes this dark, that would be the heavy focus on Eddie Guerrero as the voice over says “Is there actually life after death? Or are the memories we create here the only true after life?” In May 2004, this wouldn't have meant all that much (although I still feel it would've felt unnecessarily over-the-top), but considering Guerrero passed away less than a year and half later, watching the footage in May 2018 is a little uncomfortable. The open also included John “Bradshaw” Layfield, Booker T, The Undertaker, Rene Dupree and John Cena.

Our commentary team of Michael Cole & Tazz welcomed us to the Staples Center in Los Angeles, California, after some pyro and what have you. Hugo Savinivich & Carlos Cabrera were there to provide Spanish commentary, good lads. 

Tag Team Match - Rey Mysterio & Rob Van Dam vs. The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray & D-Von)

This was a fun, well-booked opener, that played to it's strengths and despite going a little too long in this reviewer's opinion, managed to keep the Staples Center hot and behind the ultra babyface duo of Rey Mysterio & Rob Van Dam throughout. The Dudley Boyz dominated the majority with plenty of intensity and heely tactics, with Bubba Ray in particular shining as he repeatedly distracted the ref to do something dastardly. Bubba's character work was on point here, as he showed glimpses of what would become his Bully Ray character in TNA many years later and it was clear from this that he had the most potential for a singles run. Mysterio & RVD are a fun team and the brief flashes of offence from them provide just enough to buoy the bout at the right times, whilst also both selling the beating they take from the Dudleyz well. There's a couple of instances of awkardness, like a poorly conceived monkey flip from RVD to Bubba Ray and an overall lack of cohesion from the Dudley Boyz, who appear to operate as two singles wrestlers rather than the well-oiled machine that you'd expect at this point. However, the finishing stretch features a couple of nice near falls and the highlight of the match as RVD pops Mysterio straight up into a frankensteiner to D-Von. Probably not quite good enough to go out of your way to check out on it's own, but it works as the curtain jerker and the Staples Center loved everything Mysterio & RVD had to offer.

Next Pay-Per-View – At Great American Bash on 27th June, Rey Mysterio defended the Cruiserweight Championship (which he won on the 17th June SmackDown) against Chavo Guerrero, Rob Van Dam got a shot at John Cena's United States Championship in a Fatal Four-way, whilst The Dudley Boyz battled The Undertaker in the one and only Concrete Crypt match as the main event. 

A very young and oddly dressed Josh Mathews hosted a weird interview in Booker T's lockeroom, that for some reason was filled with candles, concluding with Booker revealing that a mysterious pouch will help him beat the Undertaker in their match later on the show. Booker's performance actually wasn't all that bad, but the gimmick is stupid and has very little to do with anything that he said.

Some shots of the outside of the Staples Center, which was bathed in sunlight on what looks like a lovely afternoon all round.

This show continues to get weirder as SmackDown General Manager Kurt Angle arrived in what I can only describe as a contraption, pushed out by Luther Reigns, with Angle rising up into the air whilst sitting in a wheelchair with a French flag on the back. Angle proceeded to cut a cheap heat promo on Los Angeles, ending by wishing an earthquake on the city, before calling out Torrie Wilson and telling her if she lost her match with Dawn Marie she'd be fired...this was apparently because Angle had blamed Wilson for the injury he'd suffered at the hands of the Big Show. I'm not familiar with the angle, but it sounded pretty lame. 

Singles Match – Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie

This match is trash, pure and utter trash. Apart from swathes of sloppy strikes and awkward reversals, the “highlight” of the match was Wilson attempting to hold the tights on pinfall (despite being a babyface) and “accidentally” revealing Marie's arse to the Staples Center. This gets a massive pop. Despite their being a clear storyline to be told, with Wilson being thrown straight into a career-threatening match against a woman who had previously shagged her Dad to death, the only thing that garners a reaction is the sight of woman's (almost) bare backside. Someone should let this crowd know about the internet or indeed actual women. If you ever want to show someone an example of how far women's wrestling has come in WWE over the last 15 years, this is probably a good place to start. 

Next PPV – The Great American Bash would see Torrie Wilson's momentum halted as she lost to Sable, whilst Dawn Marie wouldn't return to PPV until October's No Mercy where she'd tag with The Dudley Boyz in a losing effort against Charlie Haas, Miss Jackie & Rico. 

Whilst surrounded bottles of champagne, John “Bradshaw” Layfield cut a promo on America, with strong xenophobic overtones, before ending by claiming that he will be victorious over Eddie Guerrero later on. 

Singles Match – Mordecai vs. Scotty 2 Hotty

The ludicrously dressed Mordecai's first of just three broadcast WWE bouts saw the 6 foot 3 Memphian squash former WWF Light Heavyweight Champion Scotty 2 Hotty. If this had been on an episode of SmackDown it would've been a decent introduction to Mordecai as he looks pretty impressive at points, showing good intensity and has a couple of inventive spots like a sneaky submission hold around the ring post. But this is PPV and a match like this really has not place on an event that people are paying for. The highlight was a short Scotty comeback that got a massive pop from the crowd as he hit a superkick that busted open Mordecai's lip. The Crucifix powerbomb that Modercai wins with is a lame choice as finisher and nowhere near the best incarnation of the move. 

Next PPV – Mordecai took on Hardcore Holly at The Great American Bash, whilst Scotty 2 Hotty wouldn't be back on PPV until January as he took part in the 2005 Royal Rumble, with this bout being his final PPV singles match.

Jacqueline presented Chavo Guerrero with some underwear backstage, whilst Chavo Classic was seen with his trousers around his ankles for some reason. 

WWE Tag Team Championship Match – Rico & Charlie Haas © (w/ Miss Jackie) vs. Hardcore Holly & Billy Gunn

This really was a match of two halves, beginning with some dated homophobic comedy and concluding with a rather good closing sequence. The first six minutes of the match was bad comedy, which with 2018 vision is not a lot of fun to watch, as everyone seems afraid of the effeminate Rico, who constantly feels up his opponents. Basically, Rico was rehashing the Goldust gimmick and not doing so all that brilliantly, but it has to be said that the Staples Center seemed to lap up all the various sexual positions that the competitors fell into. 2004 was a world away in more ways than one it seems. Also why was Billy Gunn so afraid of Rico now? It's like Billy & Chuck has been retconned. The beginning is made all the more frustrating by the fact that the finish features some of the best work on the show so far, with all four men delivering high quality back and forth action, as the momentum changes repeatedly, before Rico nails Holly with a superkick just before Holly can hit an Alabama Slam on Haas. If the company had been more focused on putting on good wrestling than telling a bad joke, then this could have been a very satisfying ten minutes. 

Next PPV – After dropping the Tag Team titles to the Dudley Boyz on 17th June SmackDown, Charlie Haas would compete in a singles match with Luther Reigns at The Great American Bash, whilst Rico would wait until No Mercy in October for the aforementioned six person tag match, which would turn out to be his final PPV match with WWE. Billy Gunn and Hardcore Holly would both compete in singles matches at Great American Bash, against Kenzo Suzuki (Gunn's last ever one on one match on a WWE PPV) and Mordecai respectively. 

A quick backstage promo from The Undertaker and Paul Bearer that really offered up nothing of note.

The commentary team discussed how much “voodoo” Booker T would have to bring in order to defeat The Undertaker later on. Fuck off. 

Highlights of Chavo Classic beating Jacqueline on SmackDown and Jacqueline pulling Classic's trousers down after the match. Fuck off. 

WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match – Chavo Guerrero (w/ Chavo Classic) vs. Jacqueline (C) 

This was lame. I hated pretty much everything that happened here, from the counterproductive gimmick of Guerrero having one arm tied behind his back to the presentation of Jacqueline to the multiple interference spots from Classic in the finish. No one came out looking good, no one got any extra heat, the Cruiserweight title looked like a joke and I wanted to scratch my eyes out with a rusty spoon. I don't want to talk anymore about it. 

After the match, Chavo Guerrero cut a short promo about something, before Chavo Classic kicked Jacqueline in the gut. Brilliant. Well done.

Next PPV – Chavo Guerrero would drop the Cruiserweight title to Chavo Classic on the SmackDown following this PPV (in a three way that also included Spike Dudley), with Classic later dropping the belt to Rey Mysterio. At The Great American Bash, Guerrero received a shot at Mysterio's title. Jacqueline would be released by WWE the following month, eventually resurfacing in TNA in November, facing Trinity at Victory Road.  Jacqueline would make her WWE PPV return 14 years later at the 2018 Royal Rumble. 

A quick package lets us know that Rene Dupree and John Cena are feuding because Dupree hates the United States and also for some reason, Torrie Wilson. The highlight of their feud seemed to be Dupree powerbombing Cena through the announce table. 

John Cena got to do a little rap before his match, which was not great and pretty much buried Dupree, but was over with the LA crowd. 

WWE United States Championship Match - John Cena © vs. Rene Dupree

Not a classic at all here, as Rene Dupree showed us why this was his one and only one on one WWE PPV match. The French Phenom looked sloppy when taking and receiving offence for pretty much the whole bout, whilst the early exchanges were particularly poor as Dupree struggled to get over the top rope on a clothesline spot, before taking a weird looking bump into the turnbuckle off an Irish whip. Whilst Dupree would later hit a number of big moves, including a spinebuster, DDT and a clunky neckbreaker, the Frenchman either didn't cover Cena or was slow to the cover, which made the then 20 year old grappler come out of the match looking like a bit of chump. Whether this was purposefully done to help John Cena, I'm not sure, but it certainly didn't help the match. For his part, Cena looked competent, but it would be stretch to say that the Massacusettsan appeared to have anywhere near the star potential that he'd develop in coming months and years, although he was notably over with the LA audience (although they appear to be happy with what has been a pretty awful PPV so far, so lets not trust their reactions anymore). The highlight was a big spot that saw Dupree dodge a crossbody while on the apron, sending Cena over the top and to the floor and even this didn't make a whole load of sense if you thought about it for more than half a second. It looked cool though, so there's that.

Next PPV – Both Cena and Dupree would be involved in a Four-way match for Cena's US title at The Great American Bash. 

Kenzo Suzuki is coming to SmackDown and he tells us so in Japanese, I imagine. 

The package for The Undertaker vs. Booker T showed once again how inept the SmackDown creative department was at the time as whilst the storyline appeared to initially be run of the mill as Booker attempted to establish himself after jumping from RAW to SD, it quickly devolved into Booker enlisting the help of a voodoo priestess and putting dirt from a graveyard into a bag. Why? 

Singles Match – The Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer) vs. Booker T

This would be a poor match if anyone was involved, but considering you have two top level talents in here, it makes for an even more painful watch. The gimmick that Booker has a bag of dirt that he keeps rubbing on himself for somekind of advantage is bad enough, but when you consider that it gives Booker absolutely no help, even when he resorts to lobbing the dirt into the Deadman's eyes it produces some of the most mind-numbing action either man has ever been involved in. It's clear that neither guy gives a shit about the match, with The Undertaker in particular half-arsing his performance, no-selling his leg after Booker spent some time on it, whilst also struggling with his ring positioning on a number of occasions. Both men do shit looking version of their signature holds for the finish of what must be considered some of the least inspired work of either man's career.

Next PPV – At Great American Bash, The Undertaker would face The Dudley Boyz in the main event, the first ever and indeed only, Concrete Crypt match, whilst Booker T would be involved in the four-way bout for the United States Championship. 

John “Bradshaw” Layfield's rise up the card was the main thrust of the promo package for the main event, until the despicable angle that saw Eddie Guerrero's mother “suffer a heart attack” at a live event after being confronted by JBL. Fuck off. Who is booking this shit? SmackDown was a pile of shit at this point and I'm glad I'm only watching this PPV and not sitting through what looks like a terrible time to be a fan of the blue brand.

JBL proceeded to cut a promo about Mexico being a shithole and wanting to put Eddie Guerrero on a raft back home (despite Guerrero being from El Paso, Texas), whilst also offering Guerrero's mother a job as his maid. Eugh. This doesn't make me hate the character or want to see him get his comeuppance, it just makes me cringe and want to watch anything else. 

Singles Match for WWE Championship – John “Bradshaw” Layfield vs. Eddie Guerrero © 

Okay, so this match is remembered for one thing and one thing only. Which is, of course, JBL nailing one of the dirtiest chair shots in WWE history and Eddie Guerrero slicing his head to fuck in a horrendous bladejob. More on that in a moment, lets skim over the rest of the bout first, even if it is pretty inconsequential stuff. There was some firey brawling early on and a botched spot in the mid-way point that leads to some awkwardness as the two, quite surprisingly, struggle to improvise their way back to where they need to be. That botch adds a lot of time that the match really doesn't need, as I feel a quicker match that escalated quickly to the chair shot would have been more fitting to the rivalry that had been built around JBL hating Mexico and almost killing Eddie's Mom, rather than JBL whacking on about six chinlocks. I guess the reason this had to go so long is that neither of the other featured matches went much over ten minutes and the pair were forced to kill time.

Let's talk about that blood baybeeeeeee. Because it is fucking horrific and super uncomfortable to watch at various times, meaning that this match is not one for anyone a little squeamish. That's without mentioning some of the nastiest chairshots that the WWE has ever seen being thrown by both men. The blood however does create some wonderful visuals, improve the strength of any near fall that JBL has on Latino Heat and make Guerrero's comeback an absolute experience to witness. Seriously though, Guerrero hulking up after kicking out of a Clothesline from Hell and a JBL bomb, whilst covered in, and dripping, blood is a moment that is so ridiculous that somehow it works. The crowd goes absolutely nuts for their hero as he refuses to lie down for a men who has criticised his heritage and people. Therefore, it's difficult not to say that the finish of the bout itself comes across as more than a little lame, as after multiple ref bumps, Guerrero nails JBL in the goolies and then clobbers him with the WWE title belt for a DQ finish. It makes logical sense that Guerrero couldn't see another way out, but couldn't bare to lose to JBL, but the fact that Eddie would never manage a victory over the man that basically caused his Mom a heart attack really doesn't sit right. 

The post-match attack makes up for the crappy finish somewhat as Guerrero went mad on JBL, with a pair of brutal unprotected chair shots and a Frog Splash, before the two are eventually separated by a number of WWE officials, including Fit Finlay, Arn Anderson, Dean Malenko and Steve Keirn.

Next PPV – Layfield would get a second chance at the WWE Championship as he got a rematch with Guerrero at the Great American Bash, this time in a Texas Bullrope match. 

This is not a good PPV, not a good PPV in the slightest. The only match I'd recommend going and checking out is the main event, because I think there's more merit to that bout than simply seeing the chair shot and brutal bladejob in a YouTube clip. There's moments in both the opening tag and the Tag title bout, but outside of that there's nothing on this show, as two of the top three matches fall flat, especially The Undertaker vs. Booker T clash. However, match quality isn't my biggest problem with this show. My biggest problem is that beyond the opening match, every single match on the card has an element of sexism, racism, homophobia or xenophobia, that (according to the crowd reactions from LA in 2004) has not aged very well at all. It feels like the only way the creative team knew how to get heat was to alienate elements of their own fanbase and the only way they knew how to get a reaction was to use lazy poorly conceived stereotypes. There's stuff on this show made me cringe and will I'm sure make others feel even more uncomfortable. Don't waste your time with Judgment Day 2004, lads. 

For an alternative look at this event, check out our good pal Marc Pearson's review from his 10 Years Ago series. 

Next time - WCW Slamboree 1993 

Opinion: Top 10 Jobber Themes (Lily Lestrange)

I've only gone and written a bloody list.  What have I become?! 

I thought I'd switch it up a bit for this month's guest blog since I'm always writing stuff that's fairly serious and informative.  So why not be fun aunt Lily this month and write a list of my top ten favourite jobber themes?

Please note that I do say jobber but these guys all worked hard in the WWE, no matter how long they were there for... and none of them reeeeeally constitute as "jobbers" because they've all achieved something at some point (yes, even number 9) but fuck it.  My ball, my rules. Besides, I use the term as lovingly as possible! They're all in this list because their themes are catchy as fuck and if you've ever had the misfortune to be in my presence then I've probably sang at least one of these themes in your face. Enjoy.

10.  The Mountie

If you didn't watch wrestling in the 80s/early 90s then you probably won't know who this is... UNTIL NOW.  The Mountie's claim to fame in WWE was winning the Intercontinental Championship that one time and winning the tag titles four times (once with his brother and three times as part of The Quebecers). His grotesquely chirpy theme will have your leg jigging and will have you craving maple syrup over EVERYTHING in no time.  It doesn't help that it sounds like something that Trey Parker and Matt Stone have written for an especially Canadian episode of South Park.

9. The Great Khali 

Ah, Khali.  The Punjabi Playboy, our sweet prince of the desert.  Let's be honest, the greatest thing that he ever done in the WWE was sing happy birthday to John Cena and get swung around by Cesaro (he did feud with Triple H for the WWE title and he won the Heavyweight Championship that one time but let's not talk about that) but we love him for the big lug that he is anyway.  Or at least I did.  Now departed from the WWE, I hear Dixie's wanting to recruit him under the guise of "The Average Taj".  Anyway, his theme was bangin' and if it doesn't make you want to dance on a table and get your bhangra on then nothing will.

8. Zack Ryder 

This may come as a shock as you'd probably expect this of all jobber themes to be higher up in the list but nope.  As irritatingly catchy as it is there's better ones out there! I think this theme takes the award for most ridiculous lyrics of any theme song ever... and that's in a world where "Ass Man" exists. Another lyrical masterpiece of big Jim J.  

I think everyone still holds on to the hope that they'll make something magical of Ryder one day. We thought it was when he most recently won the IC championship but, well... we all know how that went. Just keep on drinkin them beers and chatting up them hot babes bro, your time will come one day.

7. Heidenrich  

What an absolute monster of a man, it's a shame that he was only with the WWE for 3 years. His career peaked with his feud with the Undertaker then it all went downhill from there when he became part of the new Legion of Doom (y'know, the one after the original one but before The Ascension who got papped with it and told to run with it). If you're into mash-ups then there's a brilliant one of this and Ryback's theme floating about the interwebs. Go have a look and let your life be changed for the best part of three minutes.

6. D'Lo Brown 

MA BOY D'LO.  He couldn't not be included in this list.  He did well for himself after leaving the Nation of Domination and had some tasty feuds with the likes of X-Pac, Mark Henry and Jeff Jarrett but when you look at how far his rivals went compared to what he's done then you realise he didn't quite go the distance. If he stuck around after 2003 (and he was released so this is through no fault of his own) he could have probably done a lot better but he's flitted between so many companies so many times that he's never stayed anywhere long enough to build a great feud with anyone. His fourth(?) theme was the best one and I'm willing to bet at least a few of you managed to bugger up your neck from trying to get on the d'lo with D'Lo and his theme. 

5. Santino Marella 

I've no idea what the fuck this guy is singing but it gets you pumped. I kid on to myself that it's the man himself singing it because no-one apart from WWE and Jim Johnston are credited for it (and I can't imagine Jimmy J having lungs like that on him). Santino was great though, I'm not really one for liking wrestlers with comedy gimmicks but Santino got me man, he got right in deep to my lil cold black heart. Much like Khali, I don't really remember him for his wrestling ability but more so the daft shit he got involved in, like when he was heel and was trying to tell all the kids that Santa wasn't real and the wee romance he had going with Emma. No matter what you remember him for, no-one will forget him power walking to the ring to this belter of a theme.

4. Rob Conway 

This was so close to being number one but I decided against it because there's other ones that I prefer over it but, I mean... how random is this theme?!  I love it. LOVE IT. Redneck country jobber realness.

His most memorable matches were probably when he was part of La Resistance and feuding with Edge and Benoit for the tag titles, which they won three times. After that La Resistance split and he became a singles competitor, where he became a redneck heel with a cowboy hat and a nifty handlebar moustache. He fought and feuded with a few other mid-card/jobber wrestlers then decided to pick on Flair for the IC championship one night on RAW, which was pretty much the beginning of the end of his WWE career. He lost every match after that then ended up being released in 2007. All is not lost though, because he moved on to NWA where he currently wrestles and is a two time NWA Heavyweight Champion, so all's well that ends well eh?

3. Shelton Benjamin 

Oh, he gonna bring it to ya because there ain't no stoppin' him, NAAAAAAW.  I think I'm pulling at straws a bit here by calling Shelton Benjamin a jobber since he won many a title with WWE. At best he was upper mid-card (given that he pinned Triple H clean twice back in the day, that was pretty special) but he's getting put in this list because I love this theme. He's probably jobbed to someone, somewhere, at some point in his life... maybe. Fuck it. Just listen to the damn song.

2. Chavo Guerrero 

Let's face it, Chavo's shining time in WWE was when he was tagging with Eddie. You're thinking it, I'm thinking it, we're all thinking it. He was a six-time Cruiserweight Champion too, then he went with that whole Kerwin White gimmick and I completely lost interest. I was never a huge Chavo fan when he was with WWE but he done well for himself in Lucha Underground and currently wrestles for AAA so he's doing not too shabby. His theme is ridiculously similar to Eddie's "Lie, Cheat and Steal" theme (the newer version, think it was the 9th theme) but it's one of my favourites regardless. I was desperate to hear the "OOOOOH CHAAAAAVOOOOO" hit at ICW when Chavo and Hardcore Holly were booked at other shows in Scotland at the same time but it sadly wasn't meant to be.

And now, we're finally here... number one!  I need a lie down now.  I need a nap and I need to be away from wrestling and wrestling themes now because I have listened to a fucking lot of them today. My ears hurt and I'm pretty sure one of my toenails is falling off because of the stress of it all. Maybe you expected this theme, maybe you didn't. I'd like to think that I've thrown a huge curveball and gave you something completely out of the blue but who knows.  Just enjoy.

1. Christian 

Now now now, before you kick off, hear me out. Christian's career is dazzling.  Blinding.  Sparkling.  MAGNIFIQUE.  At the peak of his career, that is. The last few years for Christian in the WWE haven't been so great; back in 2014 when he was wrestling he was always inserted into six-man tag matches or title matches like Elimination Chamber and Money In The Bank, purely because - I think - they didn't have anyone else that could fill the space at the time. His last match was in March 2014 against Del Rio, Sheamus and Ziggler then after that he wasn't seen in a ring again...then it was announced that he'd been released from his talent contract back in May, meaning he was still doing other stuff with WWE but just wasn't wrestling with them anymore. It's a shame given his history but a string of injuries lead him to this point.

NOW, the theme I want you to hear isn't his last theme that he used. No no no, I'm taking you back to 2001 with his "At Last" theme. Just... watch the video if you've never seen the titantron for it before. Everything about it is amazing. The theme is one of the catchiest themes you'll hear, ever. I don't think I could love another theme like I love this one and if you don't love it too then I don't know what to tell you. Just enjoy the acid trip that this is gonna induce once you click that play button.

Lucha Underground 7th January 2015 Review

           Those Lucha Underground chaps only went and crowned their first champion on their first show of 2015! But was the show actually any good? Let's take a look

Lucha Underground Championship Aztec Warfare

Fenix vs. Johnny Mundo vs. Mr. Cisco vs. King Cuerno vs. Son of Havoc vs. Pimpinella Escarlita vs. Prince Puma vs. Ivelisse Velez vs. Drago vs. Bael vs. Cortez Castro vs. Ricky Mandel vs. Big Ryck vs. Pentagon, Jr. vs. Super Fly vs. Chavo Guerrero, Jr. vs. Mascarita Sagrada vs. Sexy Star vs. El Mariachi Loco vs. Mil Muertes

       Aztec Warfare is essentially a Twenty Man Royal Rumble, but with pins and submissions instead of over-the-top rope eliminations. This style of match, of course, suited Lucha Underground's performers much better than your traditional battle royal, as it allowed them to pull off some exciting flips and tricks over the top rope, whilst also allowing the ring to be cleared at times to allow for some more exciting action inside the ring. Unlike your traditional WWE-style Royal Rumble, which more often than not has a lot of guys standing around or dicking about by the ropes, this match was full-on action from start to finish.

      Alongside the quite frankly ridiculous action, a few storylines and feuds were weaved into the match. There was the struggle of Big Ryck's Crew to stay in the match before Big Ryck arrived, in which they ultimately failed, leaving Big Ryck to get eliminated thanks to a three pronged flippy floppy attack by Johnny Mundo, Prince Puma and Fenix. There was rascally veteran Chavo Guerrero, Jr's steel chair based madness, as he twatted many a wrestler in the head, before Sexy Star continued the pairs feud. The return of Blue Demon, Jr. to attack Guerrero felt like an important moment and the set up to a chair shot from Star allowed that story to reach a satisfying conclussion in the match.

    The final two in the match were Prince Puma and Johnny Mundo, with Mundo having been in the match since the very beginning. With the pair having main evented the first Lucha Underground, this felt like fitting finish to the match to crown the first champion. The pair had an engaging battle, with both going back and forth with a series of exciting moves. A top rope reverse rana from Mundo was perhaps the highlight of the bout for me. Puma's selling was also particularly impressive, especially with Mundo looking to see up for a Spanish Fly on the top rope, Puma looked genuinelly out of it. The finish saw Puma knock Mundo off the top turnbuckle, crotching him on the rope, before delivering a kick and a beautiful 630 splash to pick up the victory and become the first Lucha Underground Champion. It was refreshing to see a match end in such a fashion, as both men are big stars for the promotion so to see one of them gain a clean victory over the other on TV, was a nice change to WWE's usual shitty finishes. 

      This was a great watch from start to finish, which felt like the action didn't stop one bit, and the action was always exciting, with each wrestler getting an opportunity to show off, at least some of their style in the ring. If you hadn't seen Lucha Underground before this would be a good match to start with, as you get to see twenty of the promotions top stars, pulling out some of their most exciting moves. Put quite simply, this match was an awful lot of fun to watch.

Finally...

I thought having only one match take up the entire show was an interesting concept that having only an hour long show affords Lucha Underground the chance to do. As the show went to commercial breaks you had a reason to continue watching to see how the match would unfold, and unlike WWE's commercial breaks you didn't go into the break with a rest hold, you went in with a Tope Conhilo or some other flippy move.  This show is steadily become on of the strongest and most unique on the market at the moment, if you're not watching Lucha Underground, you should be.

Lucha Underground Ep. 1 - (Mundo vs. Puma) Review

Earlier this week a brand new wrestling product began to air on the El Rey network, which incidentally only air on the other side of the pond. But of course, with the power of the internet these days, if something airs somewhere in the world, it is available everywhere else within 24 hours. So I thought I'd give it a cheeky look and let you fine people know if you should be checking out the show as well. 

Presentation

One of the most important parts of any wrestling television show is the presentation, television is a visual medium after all. Lucha Underground is supposedly set in head honcho Dario Cueto's make-shift temple, which is a bit of hodge-podge, truth be told. I found it difficult to believe Dario Cueto when he spoke about his wrestlers needing to have respect to fight in his temple, when the visual didn't quite match up. It looked as if there hadn't been a clear brief on what was needed from the set, to me. What is important though is that this setting looked visually different from any other wrestling show at the moment. It would have been silly to try to reproduce WWE's look on a smaller budget, TNA is still undecided on how it wants to present it's product and Ring of Honor has the Indy look nailed on, so I commended the Lucha Underground team for trying something different with this.

Talking of differences between Lucha Underground and other products, the backstage segments are completely different from what I've seen a wrestling company do before. The scenes were filmed very theatrically, with multiple cameras and even incidental music added on top. This won't be everyone's cup of tea, to be honest I'm not sure if it's mine, but this style makes the product instantly stand out and that can only be a good thing. Although, I think if this was the style they could have brought in a better actor to play the owner of promotion, Cueto.

On Commentary duty, Matt Striker comes across as extremely knowledgeable, comfortably calling the matches and adding any extra details that he think will add to the story. This felt much more like the Striker that used to commentate on WWE's version of ECW, rather than what he presented later in his WWE career. Unfortunately, his partner Vampiro, often feels like a fish out of water. Floundering all over the shop, randomly naming moves and genuinely sounding like he was getting on Striker's nerves throughout. Hopefully, AAA will notice this and quickly replace Vampiro with someone else, better suited to the role.

Johnny Mundo vs. Prince Puma

The main event of the show saw, Johnny Mundo, better known as John Morrison, taking on Prince Puma, better known as Ricochet. Before the match got under way, there were a number of segments geared toward building up the main event. The first of these saw Cueto talking to Konnan in his office. I found this segment utterly bizarre and devoid of all logic. Cueto had apparently "signed (Mundo) to make an example of him" and wanted Konnan's new protege Puma to take him out and collect the $100,000 prize that Cueto had offered up at the top of the show. Please someone explain to me how that makes any sense? 

A video package explaining the relationship between Konnan and Prince Puma was later shown. There was a lot of cool stuff thrown in here, like the explanation as to why Luchadores wear masks and it allowed the fans to get an idea of what to expect from Puma in the ring later on, for anyone not familiar with Ricochet. I do find Konnan a very odd choice as his manager though, as he's never been someone I'd considered a great mic worker. 

The match itself was a lot of fun to watch, as the two pulled out a series of tricks and flips. The pair seemed to have a chemistry in the ring, flowing nicely through a series of back and forth exchanges. There was little in the way of psychology, but I don't think that's what this match needed to be, anyway, being the debut programme, it was a lot more important that the new audience got an opportunity to see what these two could do in the ring. Both men were allowed to look good, with Puma standing up nicely against the former WWE star, with a missed Standing Moonsault being turned into a Standing Shooting Star Press being one of the highlights of Puma's offence. 

The slight bit of story that the match was given was Mundo's multiple attempts to hit the move formerly known as Starship Pain and now rechristened The End of the World. Firsty, Puma would thwart Mundo by catching him with a School Boy Roll up for a nice near fall. The second attempt saw Puma rolling out of the ring and hitting his signature Chocolate Rain for another well worked near fall. Finally, after a nice sequence saw Puma slip out of Mundo's powerbomb attempt, Mundo was able to hit a Solo Spanish Fly, before dragging Mundo to the corner and hitting The End of the World to pick up the victory. This was a nice inclusion as it built a little bit of drama into the match, with the crowd knowing if Mundo hit the move it would be the end of the match.

Following the match, Cueto was out to offer Mundo the $100, 000, only to remove the offer, as three men ran into the ring and destroyed both Mundo and Puma, firstly with a cool double team 3-D/Codebreaker construct, before the bigger of the three nailed Mundo with a huge Ura-nage slam. These three men were former WWE wrestler Ezekiel Jackson, now going by the name Big Ryck, former ROH wrestler Ricky Reyes, going by the name Cortez Castro and Lil Cholo, going by the name Mr. Cisco. It was revealed they worked for Cueto. I have to admit a ground a little at the conclusion to the show, as the Heel faction with the boss as their leader, really has been run into the ground. I'm happy to give Lucha Underground the benefit of the doubt for now on this angle however.

Lucha Underground have even put this match up on Youtube. Give it a look.

The Undercard

On the undercard for the show, Chavo Guerrero took on Blue Demon Jr. in a match that I just couldn't get my head around. The two had an awkward match, with a confusion over who was supposed to be playing the heel or babyface. For example, Demon would be slapping Chavo hard in the face and then begin to clap to attempt to get the crowd involved in the match. This could have been forgiven if the action in the ring was any good, but it simply wasn't. A terrible looking headscissors from Demon, a dodgy Tornado DDT and a horrible top rope powerbomb complete with a awkward set up, and that's the three big moves in the match that all looked piss poor. Demon would go on to pick up the win as Chavo tapped out to El Chulo, which at least made some sense considering Chavo had probably broken his back taking that nasty top rope powerbomb.

Later on in the show, Chavo was seen getting a verbal beating from Cueto, who really is all over this product. Cueto told Chavo he would have to find a new opponent for Demon, seeing as Chavo couldn't get the job done. I'm not sure why Cueto wants Demon to be taken out, as this wasn't explained, and meant that Demon playing the heel for some of the previous match made even less sense. 

Elsewhere, Son of Havoc (previously known as Matt Cross on WWE's Tough Enough, as well as ROH, Chikara, Wrestle Society X and elsewhere) took on AAA's Sexy Star. Sexy Star's gimmick is that she's a girl. There was some good back story put into it via a video package, but when you boil it down that's what her gimmick is. That meant that the story of the match was the Havoc should be booed because he's fighting a girl who has chosen to wrestle him. I just couldn't buy into it and therefore didn't feel any sympathy for Star. There were some nice moments and everything looked alright in the ring, but when a match goes less than two minutes, it's difficult to really judge anything. Havoc picked up the win with a Side Slam Backbreaker. The commentators also insinuated that Havoc was grabbing the tights during the pin, but it just looked like he was copping a feel of Star's arse.

Finally...

There was a lot to like about Lucha Underground, the look and feel are completely different from anything that's on TV at the moment, in both terms of what is shown from the arena and the backstage footage. The main event was also a lot of fun to watch, with both Mundo and Puma standing out as wrestlers who could offer a lot for the promotion going forward. That being said, the other two matches on the show did absolutely nothing for me, Chavo Guerrero and Blue Demon Jr's match especially was unforgivably poor, especially considering Guerrero is supposedly a driving force behind the direction of the show.

However, I would certainly recommend this show to anyone who is tiring of WWE's output, to at least give it a try, as you may find that some of the new things that Lucha Underground is doing will appeal to you. If they don't you've wasted 45 minutes and can send me angry message on Twitter, if you so wish. I know I'll be checking out Episode Two anyway.

Quick Results and Match Ratings

Blue Demon, Jr defeated Chavo Guerrero - DUD

Son of Havoc defeated Sexy Star - N/A

Johnny Mundo defeated Prince Puma - *** 1/4

TNA Slammiversary 2013 Review

Slammiversary was strong pay-per-view outing for TNA, with a number of solid, entertaining contests, including a surprisingly brutal contest between Gail Kim and Taryn Terrell, which was unfortunately let down by the shambolic ending to the main event contest.

World Heavyweight Championship No Holds Barred Match:  Bully Ray © vs. Sting

     I wasn’t expecting this match to be a technical master class and neither was I expecting it to go for particularly long, however what was presented was such a mess of a match it was difficult to find many positives, apart from the result. From the opening of the contest Sting looked obviously tired and seemed to struggle his way to the end of the match, at one point even having difficulty to get into the ring. However, the No Disqualification match type could have been used to lead these two to a decent match, if it weren’t for a number of booking errors throughout the contest.

With the opening seeing a combination of offence from both men, with Bully Ray doing most of the running for The Icon. Sting’s use of the World Championship belt and the announce table gave the bout the early edge that it needed and with Bully Ray’s thunderous clothesline as Sting prepared for a Stinger Splash on the guard rail, it seemed like this bout was heading in the right direction. However, once the pair headed towards the entrance ramp the match went progressively downhill. For some reason Bully Ray had to head backstage to collect a steel chair, which Sting quickly gained control of, before Brooke Hogan had to come out to protect Bully Ray. This made Bully look incredibly weak, which became a theme for the remainder of the match.

With Brooke Hogan sent packing by Sting, the Aces and Eights president hit a low blow which unleashed an avalanche of offence from Bully Ray. We now saw Sting, who for the majority of the contest looked like a tired, frail old man, transform into Superman. As after a number of chairs shots, including a massive big boot through the chair, Ray hit a pile driver (which had been built up in an earlier interview with JB) only for Sting to kick out. This trend continued with Sting being power bombed threw a table, only to kick out once more then. Then we entered the ridiculous, with Bully Ray dismantled the ring with a small knife, removing the mat to reveal the wood board beneath and deliver a second pile driver, only for Sting to kick out. This move was incredibly dangerous and should have been the end of the match, by this point any air of believability had been completely removed and it was difficult to get behind Sting.

Just as I thought it couldn’t get much worse, Aces and Eight invaded the ring, only for Sting to dispatch Garett Bischoff, Wes Brisco, DOC & Knox with his trusty baseball bat. It’s frustrating how weak Aces and Eight are made to look at every turn, as it removes their threat in any situation if we believe the face can easily get rid of them, as Sting did here. There was further interference from Devon, who pulled out the referee to stop the count for Sting, who went out to combat Aces and Eights again. With The Icon distracted Mr. Anderson slid Bully Ray, the hammer we’ve seen all too often, and with Sting diving from the top rope, the Bully smashed him on the head to finally get his victory. For me, this ending has removed a lot of momentum TNA had going forward with the World Heavyweight Championship,  as it took the entire of Aces and Eights to defeat a 54 year old man. Maybe if some of TNA’s competitors had made an appearance to combat the threat from Aces and Eight’s with Anderson eventually slipping in the hammer this might have been a more satisfying ending.

AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle

Before this match, Kurt Angle was announced by Dixie Carter as the second inductee into the TNA Hall of Fame. Personally, I think this is a good decision by TNA, as Kurt has done a lot for the company since jumping ship in 2006, and has put in a numerous great performance for the company both in the ring and out. Many were disappointed about the exclusion of Jeff Jarrett, however with Jarrett still in hot water with Dixie Carter and TNA around his affair with Angle’s ex-wife, it would appear Jarrett will have to wait at least until next year.

Angle and Styles have had numerous contests over the last six or seven years, with a lot of history between the two, and I can’t remember every being disappointed by one of their contests. Of course, nothing changed with this outing, as the two put on another great match, with a mixture of high flying, technical and submission wrestling.

The Lone Wolf’s new submission hold “The Calf Killer” bringing a new element to match, as AJ focused on Kurt Angle’s injured knee for the majority of the match up. With AJ finding a number of interesting ways to get the hold in, Angle sold like his life depended on it and truly made the hold look like a devastating manoeuvre. The two also traded a number of holds throughout with a number of great suplexes from Angle, with Style’s struggle to reach the ropes really selling the trifecta of German Suplexes that Angle unleashed afterwards. The highlight of the match however, saw the well-known top rope exploder German suplex from Angle, countered by Styles into a beautiful flip only for Angle to hit a Release Belly to Belly suplex, which was a true “This is awesome” moment.

With a match built around submissions, it was surprising to see this one end with a Pinfall victory for Angle. With Style’s reversing the Angle Slam into a Sunset flip, Angle quickly reversed into a nice double leg takedown for the victory. Whilst, this match felt like it could have gone a lot longer and with another fifteen minutes truly could have become a great contest, it was nice to left asking for more and hopefully we’ll see these two lock up at least one more time in the future. It’s clear that the AJ Styles storyline of the past year or so is far from over and it will be interesting to see where TNA decide to go with it from here as I really can’t work out what is coming next.

Tag Team Championship Four Way Elimination Match: Chavo Guerrero & Hernandez © Vs. Bad Influence Vs. The Dirty Heels vs. James Storm & Gunner

This was a fairly well worked contest, albeit with a few floors in logic which dented it’s enjoyability. A nice start with the two big men in the match, Gunner and Hernandez squaring off, only to get kicked in the back when bouncing of the ropes by members of Bad Influence and The Dirty Heels. It was here the classic multi man break down occurred as the match plunge into a long period of chaos, with each team getting at least one offensive move on another.

The match calmed down for a while, allowing Chavo Guerrero to remind us why TNA signed him, because he is supreme in-ring talent, yes WWE enjoyed putting him in matches with Hornswoggle, but he is an asset to the company and probably one of the best ex-WWE signing they have made. After this we got another break down, did we really need two? Yes they can be exciting, but two is a bit of an overkill.

With Hernandez fighting of Kazarian’s attack and following up with an impressive Border Toss, Chavo jumped to the top rope for a Frog Splash. This is wear things got confusing. With Chavo seemingly having pinned Kaz, Bobby Roode (from another team) stopped the ref’s count, only to point out Christopher Daniels hitting Chavo with the Tag Title belt. Roode would go on to pin Chavo with Hernandez somehow missing it all. This section of the match didn’t quite come off as clever as I’m sure it was supposed as both the Boston crowd and the audience at home tried to figure out why Bobby Roode didn’t just let Chavo pin Kazarian and hit a surprise attack straight after.

With just The Dirty Heels and the newly formed Storm and Gunner left, the match settled down into a much more comfortable pace. Gunner more than held his own amongst much more experienced competitors. Having to take a lot of offence from Roode & Aries, including a 450 splash from Aries which seemed to end the contest, only for a last minute kick out. After this we headed to a satisfying ending with an Aries taking a Last Call Super kick from Storm and falling into Gunner’s torture rack, newly christened the Gun Wreck for the submission victory. The new team work well throughout and really looked the part, with hopefully Gunner being able to benefit from the association with Storm not only through crowd reaction but also in terms of in ring psychology and technique which the big man could still do with building upon.

Best of the Rest

There was also a fantastic Last Knockout Standing Match, between Gail Kim and Taryn Terrell. Yes, I did say I wasn’t looking forward to this match for a number of reasons, and even criticised Terrell’s in ring ability on a number of occasions and I’d like to take this opportunity to apologise to both competitor’s especially Terrell.

It was a vicious looking contest, with both taking a number of bumps on what looks like an unforgiving entrance ramp, including a head first dive from Terrell which looked extremely painful. Not only was the bout brutal, there was also some nice psychology paying off here, based around the figure four leg lock, which both competitors used wrapped around the ring post, especially satisfying for Terrell who was injured by the move only a few weeks ago. The finish saw a spot that the majority of most male wrestlers probably wouldn’t try, with Terrell hitting a variety of a cutter on Kim off of the ramp and onto the floor below. With Terrell just making the ten count for the victory. Although, I still feel ODB deserves better than Knockout’s Referee, this match saw Terrell earn my respect and she know fully deserves her place on the Knockout’s roster and the expected singles feud with Mickie James.

The Television Title match saw an obvious yet satisfying twist. With Aces and Eights attacking Joseph Park backstage, it was only a matter of time before his brother Abyss made an appearance. With Devon getting the referee the Countout out Park it seemed as if Devon had retained the title for another night. Oddly, this was when Abyss’ music hit and he headed down to the ring, once the fight started, for some reason the bell rang and it became an official match.

It was a short match and hopefully Abyss will get a better setting to display his talents in the near future. Although not a terrible match, it didn’t have much going for it with little excitement brought to it up until the end, with Devon flipping the double bird on Abyss only for The Monster to hit a huge Black Hole Slam for the three count. Somehow this also meant Abyss had won the Television Championship, despite Park already losing his contest via Countout. It wouldn’t have taken much to make this a title contest, but TNA continues to miss the little details on numerous occasions.

Another title change occurred in the X-Division, with Chris Sabin picking up the victory over champion Kenny King and Suicide in an Ultimate X Match. As far as Ultimate X goes this wasn’t a particularly great contest in what is usually a spot heavy gimmick match. There was a non-sensicle double submission at one point, despite the match being unable to be won in that fashion. As well as an awkward “Tower of Doom” spot which took a number of attempt and in the end wasn’t that impressive. A lot of the time the competitors didn’t quite look like they knew what was happening, this contest would have benefitted from being a regular three way. With the ending not quite living up to past outings, with King and Suicide falling from the structure leaving Sabin to pull down the belt. Although by now means a bad match and at times featuring some great athletic competition, it just couldn’t live up to previous Ultimate X matches.

For some reason Hulk Hogan decided to come out after Sabin’s victory, and say something about Destination X, despite the pay-per-view being pulled from the schedule. Hulk did nothing for Sabin in this segment and simply managed to get the crowd chanting his own name. If Hogan’s going to stick around he needs to leave the younger guys alone to create their own moments and have their own spotlight. Hogan went on to announce the opponents for Aces and Eights… despite them already being confirmed on last weeks Impact. There’s been a lot of talk about TNA’s long term booking as of late, but it appears like no one’s letting Hogan in on what’s happening on his Television show.

The six man tag match itself pitting Mr. Anderson, Garrett Bischoff & Wes Brisco against Jeff Hardy, Samoa Joe & Magnus captured this pay-per-view in one individual contest, it was at time messy with the rookies in ring positioning coming into questions on a number of occasions, at time exhilarating with Samoa Joe’s burst of energy being on par with what we’ve seen from Daniel Bryan in WWE as of late and the ending really brought the match to life with the pace building towards a fascinated conclusion, with Hardy hitting a Swanton Bomb on Brisco as he attempted to pin Magnus, with Anderson locked in the Rear Naked Choke on the ramp. Was it up there with The Shield’s six man tag matches on Raw? No.

 The other match on the card saw Gutcheck Rookies Sam Shaw and Jay Bradley face of for a place in the Bound for Glory Series. It was a basic and uninspiring contest, with neither man getting much offense in for very long. The ending looked awkward as Bradley seemed to forget what was meant to come up next, which was simply his Boomstick finishing move. Both men need to work hard to develop a story within their matches as this was non-existent here. I can’t see Jay Bradley being much more than a whipping boy within the Bound for Glory Series.

Finally…

What have we learnt from this year Slammiversary?

1. If Aces and Eight are never made to look particularly strong then there eventually downfall will not feel as exciting as their over a year reign should allow.

2.  Kurt Angle can still go with the best of them, Sting can’t.

3.       Tazz continues to point out the plot holes within TNA, to hilarious consequence on commentary.